We all know the burden of walking around uncomfortable in our own skin: the ruminating thoughts, fears, and doubts weighing so heavy on our shoulders; the words and actions, bubbling out of the turmoil of our subconscious, stilted and unsure; trying to prove something we didn’t need to.
We also know moments where we are one with a sense of ease and peacefulness; times feeling carefree, just as we are; thankful for our unique brilliance and letting it shine so sweetly. Maybe you felt this while laughing with your closest loved ones, basking in nature, frolicking freely to a favorite jam, enjoying a favorite treat in silent solitude, or expressing yourself creatively.
If only we could be in that headspace all the time - a space of light hearted, tranquil gratitude. In this space, we feel a bit invincible - because we sense our deep connection to abundant love. We understand even mistakes and challenges lead to beauty and growth. We experience that sweet taste of freedom, presence, and gratitude and know this mindset is all ya need.
If only we could be free from the weight of anxiety, the pain of missed and fuzzy connections, as well as subtle - and not so subtle - betrayals to ourselves.
Truthfully, there is no escape from discomfort and tension in life. In that space, however, maybe even this fact of life isn’t a problem. Either way, there is certainly a way to feel more comfortable in our own skin, at home in our selves through the pain, loss, mistakes, and challenges.
In times of chaos, I remember one of the principles of Acceptance and Integration Training (AAIT), a counseling methodology that has worked wonders personally and professionally.
It goes like this: Acceptance is both a means and a measure of wellbeing.
How accepting of your self, life, and others are you? Do you frequently feel critical and judgmental? Do you feel that pain that comes along with criticism and judgment? Maybe some part of you knows that you are judging yourself when you do.
Let these darknesses be a light - an aha! moment - resistance and criticism shine on places where we can grow into deeper freedom.
The way through is acceptance- not approval, indulgence, liking - but tolerance without judgment or trying to fix, figure out, escape.
Start with your self - that’s all you can really control - and anytime you hear those nagging voices, know that you can be with whatever thought and feeling one more second, this time with an attitude of acceptance.
The tenderness, freedom, and openness that unfolds from this simple shift is a thing of beauty. As we come to accept ourselves as we are, we come to accept others and life as they are. With practice of acceptance comes ease, peacefulness, letting go, humor, love, gentleness, and authenticity.
In our upcoming authenticity course -
Molly Miketo of In Full Sight and myself, Florence Paquet of Grow With Flo,
will guide you into this space of ease of being, of your full authentic self. You will learn many practical tools to get there and become a part of a supportive community where you can feel liberated to go ahead and give authentic expression a go.
Join us Wednesdays from 6-8 at Alma Diem in Knoxville. Please RSVP to Florence at firstname.lastname@example.org or Molly at 865-408-8680.